No one can deny that couples who have experienced long-distance love need to cross more barriers. Because in the process of long-distance love, both sides have enough time to recover calm, and calm is the biggest enemy of love.
This is a boy’s description of his long-distance love I saw on the Internet：
“Recently, a couple moved in next door, and I found that there is such a big difference between cohabitation and long-distance love. They like to play late into the night and cook breakfast together the next day. I insist on staying up late and calling my girlfriend, but it’s hard to find a common topic. “If you’re sleepy, go to bed first.”
Their income is not high, they like to imagine the future as if nobody else. My girlfriend and I are both entrepreneurs, but we are always afraid to talk about marriage. Their quarrel was earth shaking, but when it rained, they would still give each other umbrellas.
“You might as well be drenched to death.”
I also want to give my girlfriend an umbrella, but I can’t reach it. I don’t even have a chance to fight. “
In fact, if you think about it carefully, long-distance love can make people feel the feeling of moving and helpless coexisting. Because of the distance, the length of the conversation and the chat record are never as real as hugs and kisses. But fortunately, the couple in the above story finally achieved good results. [Read:What do people think about long-distance relationships?]
Here are some suggestions for long-distance relationships.
① Calmly state the facts, plus your true feelings and expectations.
Wayward people usually like to let others guess. Instead of saying why they are unhappy, they just say, “don’t you like me anymore? Or, I feel like you don’t like me before. “
You should know that no matter how good the other party is, such groundless speculation will definitely make him explode instantly. Assuming that the root cause of anger is that the other party has not replied to the message for a long time, the correct expression is as follows:
“You haven’t answered my news for two hours (fact), I’m very worried about you (feeling). If you need to be busy with something urgent in the future, can you tell me not to suddenly disappear (expectation).“
② Don’t turn over old accounts, and do not carry out personal attacks from point to surface.
It has nothing to do with the fact that he did not return your message in five minutes, or that he did not reply to you in the last ten minutes. Do you really want to ask him to explain all the historical crimes at once because of a small matter?
Whether for lovers or friends, the most stupid sentence pattern is: “because you XX, so I think you are a X X person.” Please state what you see and feel objectively, instead of putting arbitrary negative labels on your favorite people. He may not care about the evaluation of others, but the blow from you can even destroy him.
③ Give a progress bar for the other person’s emotional relief.
If you give him a hint that he can be coaxed in the next second, be sure to send an message in the next second to show that you are no longer angry, or you are not so angry.
People’s patience is limited. Even if you have reason to be angry, please take care of the other side and keep quiet for three hours. In long-distance love, he can’t see the expression that you pretend to be angry, and he can’t see the relief of your expression, so you must give him some signs of relief through the text as time goes on. [Read:What is the brutal truth about relationships?]
Girls think that love is her boyfriend can make a change for her.
But if the starting point of anger is “you didn’t prove that you love me, so I successfully proved that I didn’t love me.” Then I suggest that you first find that self-confidence enough, rather than through the self righteous test to prove the existence of love.
⑤A sense of ceremony is necessary
Every night, share each other a bedtime story; reading the same book in different places; leaving a space message every night;making an appointment to wear a couple’s clothes on the same day; the two people who have saved 100 tickets or air tickets will take them to get the certificate
Who said that ceremony can only be achieved by holding hands. The ceremony of long-distance love can be more romantic.
⑥ Left a trail in her life scene
His or her toiletries must be delivered by you, including the most commonly used toothbrush. You must accompany her to visit all the places he or she often goes to in daily life, including her favorite restaurant. At least one of his or her clothes should be sent, including socks. He or she likes to eat snacks, you must not cut, this is less than 200 per month can not be stingy.
In a word, his or her life must be full of your traces.
⑦ Don’t be stingy about your love
Say “love you” at least three times a day and say in different patterns. Believe me, when you really say it, you will never feel numb. Even an outsider looks bored to death, it will be beneficial to the maintenance of feelings.
When the other party bought you a gift, you must not think that this is what he should do as a boyfriend. No one will treat you well for no reason, including that your boyfriend does it because he likes you. He doesn’t ask for your return after giving, but it’s not too much to hear a sentence “like you so much”.[Read:Lack of Freshness, That’s Why You Can’t Get Permanent Love.]
⑧Don’t be ruined by love
Especially for boys, you can say “you are my whole world” to your girlfriend, but in order to make your “whole world” better, please do not fall into the illusion of “getting a wife like this, husband can’t ask for anything”. You can’t be satisfied so easily. The journey of your career is just beginning. How can you stay in the gentle land all the time. In addition, it is said that boys who work hard are recognized as the most attractive by girls.
Long distance love won’t take up too much of your time, so you should grasp the only welfare point of long-distance love and realize yourself to enrich yourself, including girls. This is especially important. If you don’t have your own life and independent personality, all the fatal phenomena in love will appear. [Read: After ending a realationship,she made The Worst Choice.]